~Chapter One Reviews~
Oh, shit! Continue fast! And I'm with Jasper... if a girl expects something oral, she needs to wax and drink plenty of pineapple juice.
I expect the same thing of men. *smirk*
*X*X*X*
jaydogrut
HOLY HELL I SPIT MY COFFEE out on the sounds between her legs OMFG! Clicks...Alert button
*X*X*X*
ubuhall
LOL, was cracking up most of this story girl! How the hell does someone have a normal conversation while truly climaxing? I cannot put together coherent thoughts when it is good! I can't wait to see how Jasper will respond to Edward LMAO :) looking forward to more! ~Tracey xoxox
*X*X*X*
Layne Faire
Well now! That's the way to get the week started off on the right foot.
SIGH Poor Jasper. *passes epilady to Maggie* Landscape, sweetie. They appreciate it, and you will too, in the long run.
*X*X*X*
Firefly1989
Oh god,you guys made me laugh so hard *giggles* the Amazon rain forest was just hilarious! I can't wait to meet your Edward, he sounds yummy ;)
Thank you for sharing this story.
Lucy
~Chapter Two Reviews~
Knew I'd love this one. Come on, boys *and* toys? Yes, please! This chapter, though? I am positively dyin over here. Edward is too fantastic. I feel for Jasper, though, truly. Maggie is just...ugh.
And as if calling Maggie 'Snuffy' wasn't enough (which, trust me, that association is going to stick with me), I flat out choked when Edward referred to her as 'cuntpickle'. My hero.
Can't wait for Edward to give Jasper some lessons. Good times ahead!
*X*X*X*
WitchyVampireGirl
OMG..laughing..like really really hard.. trying not to pee..
snuffy.. cunt pickle..
and this Edward! OMG.. like.. UNGH.. he is soo damn cute, sexy and ohh soo naughty.. *sigh*
Loved it!
*X*X*X*
jmolly
You two are so naughty. Who let you out to play?
I'm more interested in the toys than the slash, but you've certainly set up potential for fun and smexy times.
Why do I find Jazzy's gf obnoxious, regardless of whether he's attracted to her? Probably because she's all about herself. Not a good sign if she's complaining about sex before they're even married. Especially during sex.
Alarm clock butt plugs? I am so gonna google that. lol
*X*X*X*
twilight mum69
Okay is it just me or did anyone else want to find the thickest longest dildo and shove it 'like' down her throat?As always fuckhot Edward and guessing Jasper isnt too far behind.
*X*X*X*
Leona BowmanI think Edward should teach him everything.. hahahaha.
Oh Please get the wench out of his life.. God she killing my vibe.. Fuck know wonder Jasper can seem to get off.. haha
or poor Edward, his balls want to hide..
Please tell me there is not to many chapter left.. God she is a scank... What did Jasper see in her. MMMM.. Grossssssss even if he was straight... Yucky.. lol..
Loved Edward.. that was dreamy..
~Chapter Three Reviews~
*faints* Jesus Fuck! I think, no, I KNOW, I whimpered.
Can I, pretty please with chocolate covered Jasper on top (wait wrong fic) has that scene? *bats eyes and blows kiss in a non Maggie way*
*X*X*X*
Theoneandonly Mrs EdwardCullen
You both must own a supernatural gift to create thus an incredibly awesome character or you two are just very messed up.
I love your Toyward anyway ;)
PS: Is there a chance, I can get a Toyward in nightstand-drawer-size?
*X*X*X*
ljchapa
yyyyuuuummmmmm poor sexually fustrated jasper...let edward throw him up against the wall and f**k him stupid...oh and...get RID OF SNUFFY!
awesome!
*X*X*X*
justginger
Next Week? Damn girl, you are going to keep us hanging until next week? Why? We aren't engaged to Maggie! What did we do wrong? I know that Jasper has blue balls but that's not our fault!
Gotta say, I loved it and inspite of what I say, I do love a slow burn...
*X*X*X*
Arc Morpheus
OMG...OMG...Oh My F...ing God! Damm those boys are hotter than a hot chilli sauce with an extra order of sauce too go babes...
Ohhh wifey I am slowly but surely becoming a J/E slash addict xxx hahahaha
*X*X*X*
jmolly
killing myself laughing. Love funnel? Jeepers I hope not! How the hell would it stay in? And... messy. omg Do you know what I'm picturing? That blue Tupperware cake decorating device that looks like a beehive with an injector on the end. That is so wrong.
Definitely keep brainstorming the inventive toys.
In RL I am shy and reserved. Took me a lot of years to be semi-comfortable in stores like this. Normally I put on a confident facade and tough it out. But I know a lot of things my boss would be shocked about. Like where to find Twi pornos and fake body parts. I've managed to teach my husband a thing or three, and that's saying something because he's heard of a lot of sh-
*X*X*X*
Rob's hand monkey
ass in a can...uh yeah so guess who went and looked that one up online?
do you see the big arrow bouncing and blinking over my head?
snorts!
*X*X*X*
DarkOneBL
OMG! I laughed my damn ass off! Jasper in Armani, hot! Jasper needs to go shopping without Maggie lol!
WOW! Jasper left me speechless, he certainly knows what he wants:)
Jasper needs some serious loving and I'm sure Edward is just the man he needs;)
Awesome!
~Chapter Four Reviews~
YES I totally whimpered!
OMFG Jasper singing Candyman? *DED* and Edward singing Let's Talk About Sex? PUURRRRFECT!
You know how much I love the line about ditching the girl! DO IT JASPER then you and Edward can "talk" about sex!
*X*X*X*
Twi-Mom12292005
HOLY HELL... I swear I cant wait for them just to FUCK. Please tell me if he gives the nut job his with the ol heave ho in the next few chapters? i really want Jasward to be together... Great job ladies, cant wait to read more from ya.
*X*X*X*
mkmmsm
I'm not sure what the circumstances are around Jasper's pending marriage with Snuffy, but RUN away Jasper! Run. A. Way! Right into the tattoo'd strong fucking hot arms of Edward!
*X*X*X*
Judyblue95
This is REALLY fucking hot! As an old straight woman, I find it quite interesting that I am turned on by this story...I would love to watch...great writing!
*X*X*X*
Weave the MagicYou are giving me visions of Edward/Patterson that would be sooo much fun to see him wear! :D
So how come Jasper has to like marry Margie? Is he like indebted to her? Or is he like wishing to have a wife and like 2 1/2 kids and a white piket fence? Or does his grandparents like wish to see their great grand kids like before they die? But does he really like? :D
~Chapter Five Reviews~
Ok, this would be the morally right way. An engaged man shouldn't have fun with a other man... Moment, scratch that.
Why for heaven's sake it is so hard to send Maggie, alias the cockblocking self-centered unwanted bride, in the desert? Everyone should get the chance become happy with the right partner. Especially when I get so some fun stuff to read ;)
And again a great chapter
*X*X*X*
twi nana
boys, boys, boys,
Jasper, get your Balls back, you know where they are...in REDS purse..
Edward-keep going for it, he isn't married yet LOL
*X*X*X*
Mina Rivera
DAMN THOSE COCKBLOCKING COSTUMERS! *shakes fist*
*X*X*X*
cravingtwilight
*pants* you made my good girl sundae perk up & say hello!
*X*X*X*
HeartOfDarkess
eeeeeeeekkk! omg omg THAT kiss was so fucking hot! how am i supposed to focus on work now? brilliant!
*X*X*X*
Layne Faire
NOW- Jasper needs to carry his ass on home, toss Mrs Snuffleupagus out on her obnoxious, red-headed, ass- let her keep the ring, if he has to, and buy her a nice toy for a parting gift.
Then he can trot himself right on back to the store, flip the closed sign, and E can show all about how all the toys work...personally.
J/S
and I may have whimpered, too.
*X*X*X*
nmydreamz
Ladies, I am DYING here! Fuck me six ways from Sunday! *fans self*
Brilliant. Favorite line? "Oh would you look at that, a wall was right next to us."
Thank you for posting this special Valentine's Day treat and...Happy Valentine's Day :)
xox
~Chapter Six Reviews~
Gah, this chapter was like a launching pad, everyone ready to explode!
Maggie-Maggot, same thing! ;)
She's pathetic no matter what you call her, Edward's descriptions were point on... LOL!
Poor Jasper. I second that on satin sheets! Why even make the bed, they just slide off. (believe me, we've tried to tackle those sheets, ended up on just the mattress.)
E's text got me worked up...next Monday?
Thanks for the update, no thanks for the cockblock...
;)
*X*X*X*
jackiexhollywood
oh sweet baby jesus. I feel so sorry for Jasper. is there any way possible for him go like roofie/drug her so she'll pass out and he can go with Edward? Please? or if the Maggie/Jasper sex *gag* scene could be skipped over I would eternally greatful
KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK! :D
*X*X*X*
ljchapa
AWWWWW COME ON! get rid of snuffy faster...poor jasper and his blue balls...edward can help him with those if you just let him! LOVE IT!
*X*X*X*
ecullensgurl
LMAO...Damn, she was so fucking ugly, when she fell out of the ugly tree, she hit EVERY branch on the way down. Poor Edward, having to put up with skanky Maggie, but of course he has a plan. Hehehehehe And then there's Jasper. Poor guy doesn't even want to go home to his own house. Make her cum, Jasper and get the hell outta that house and go see Edward! :) BTW, thanks a helluva lot for the frickin' cliffie! LOL
*X*X*X*
PJ littlefoot
Holy shit. Did you really just leave it there? Can we fastforward to next week now? Crap. And edwards a genius. Maggie is a moron. And jasper. Thank you for finally saying what you want, even if it was only mental speak.
*X*X*X*
justginger
MPOV? Gag is right! OMG could she be any more vapid? It's like her brain cells all died off from under-use! Will you at least try to get jazz and E some action in the next chapter? Please?
maybe Maggie will be electricuted by the Hitachi... what a way to go... Jasper could wrap her up in the pink satin sheets and toss her out on her ass!
Loved this chapter :)
*X*X*X*
Theoneandonly Mrs EdwardCullen
This was so evil. I thought I had taken the wrong door and I landed in Domward's playroom although I would also not averse of it. ;)
Maggie's POV was only cruel. I mean it's nice to see, the girl can think at
least a little bit. But next time I prefer to be whipped than I look again in
her head. :(
And then the cliffhanger... The CLIFFHANGER... If there is a word to discribe
the pure evil then it is cliffhanger. It will be worse when Toyward want to
start some hot phonesex with his Jasper. I'm sure that is a breach against a
law in Toyward-land. In any case, I will now set as a hardlimit. No
cliffhangers short before the beginning of hot Toyward phonesex :D
Great chapter
~Chapter 7 Reviews~
Twi-Mom12292005
HOLY HELL... FUCKING LOVE IT, how much longer til they actually get to FUCK?
Im needing some sexual fun times with these two damn it. I say we kill off
Snuffy and let the boys Fuck on her tombstone ( too much? ) HAPPY BIRTHDAY...
I NEED and I do mean NEED them to have a FUCK fest and SOON. Im in LOVE with this story and Im really not a slash kind of girl unless it invovles 2guys and 1 girl, or 2girls and 1guy. But yeah this has me DRIPPING, I need more ASAP...
~X~X~X~
PJ littlefoot
The site is amazing!
Happy Birthday!
Oh and the actual "review" part of the review. Ummm... my brains mush.
Especially after the comment about no babies coming out of the bucket. Edward
and his morals though... can't wait for next week, to hopefully hear some fun
;) enjoy your day!
~X~X~X~
Mina Rivera
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
And great chapter.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
And thanks for the mini-lemon
HAPPY F*CKING BIRTHDAY!
And made Toyward get some already! For fucks sake!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
xoxoxo ~Mina
~X~X~X~
KellanCougar
Oh that was so HOT! I'm dreading how scorching this is going to be when they
actually get naked together... I fear my keyboard will melt.
~X~X~X~
dr3
Well Happy Birthday Ms. T: This story is incredibly *hilarious*. Totally
cringe worthy whenever Maggie-the-bitch is sexing herself up and nauseating
when poor Jasper has to touch her (or hear her] *shudder*. Bet when our boys
finally touch & ignite your readers will be drenched. O & checked out your
blog. *That Banner* Well, looking at Edward's ink... that should be against
the law, cause I just want 2lick him from tip to toe & cause I can't well
then, will just have to melt away & expire. & Jasper freakin-sexy-sweet. Well
Darlin, keep Writing & hope you have a very hot and heavy birthday where your
special someone makes you scream sweetly all night long.
